Book Blog #323: Maybe You Should Talk to Someone by Lori Gottlieb

 

Title: Maybe You Should Talk to Someone

Author: Lori Gottlieb

# of Pages: 379 (ebook)

Genre: Non-fiction, Autobiography

Rating: ★★★★★

Synopsis: One day, Lori Gottlieb is a therapist who helps patients in her Los Angeles practice. The next, a crisis causes her world to come crashing down. Enter Wendell, the quirky but seasoned therapist in whose office she suddenly lands. With his balding head, cardigan, and khakis, he seems to have come straight from Therapist Central Casting. Yet he will turn out to be anything but. As Gottlieb explores the inner chambers of her patients' lives -- a self-absorbed Hollywood producer, a young newlywed diagnosed with a terminal illness, a senior citizen threatening to end her life on her birthday if nothing gets better, and a twenty-something who can't stop hooking up with the wrong guys -- she finds that the questions they are struggling with are the very ones she is now bringing to Wendell. With startling wisdom and humor, Gottlieb invites us into her world as both clinician and patient, examining the truths and fictions we tell ourselves and others as we teeter on the tightrope between love and desire, meaning and mortality, guilt and redemption, terror and courage, hope and change.

Review: This book will make you feel like you're going to therapy.

Okay, that could be a bit of an exaggeration. However, both Gottlieb's diverse experiences with her patients as a therapist and her experiences AS a patient offer a lot of wisdom delving into how and why we feel a certain way. Gottlieb covers a lot - from relationship troubles to grappling with death, this book tells several stories of her patients to even introduce some psychology theories (e.g. Prochaska's transtheoretical model of behavior change). 

This isn't to say that this Gottlieb is preaching ideas at the reader the whole time; she expertly weaves in the lessons she's learned through her time as a therapist as well as from her therapist into the "characters'" stories. It was sometimes hard for me to remember that the people mentioned in this book AREN'T just fictional characters (although Gottlieb says there are some modifications done to conceal identities). I couldn't help but be invested in their life stories and cheer for them as their "plots" progressed, crying with them when they encountered a tragedy in their lives. 

This book also served as a great reminder of lessons many of us probably already know (or seem obvious once you hear them). Some of these include:

• Acknowledging death's inevitability can make people live fuller lives rather than ignoring it and becoming "lazy". How meaningfully people live their lives can change how easily they can accept death vs despairing/regretting later in life. 
• Compassion doesn't always lead to forgiveness - you don't have to force your feelings just because society has a "playbook" of how to handle trauma. 
• The unknown is a common source of struggle for many, but at some point it is necessary to come to terms with never finding an answer. 
• People have more freedom than they realize, and adults can feel restricted from responsibilities. One way to regain some of their freedom is to regain emotional freedom. 

As someone who likes reading about human behavior, psychology, etc., this was right up my alley and VERY readable. Probably one of my favorite reads in the last couple of years at least. I would highly recommend this book!